The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck

By Mark Manson

Despite hearing good things about this book, I was always put off by the seemingly super-edgy title. And yes, in trying to be contrarian and shocking Manson still does come off as a bit pretentious but overall I was pleased with The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. There are parts where he naively reduces an issue or topic, is unnecessarily insensitive, or curses enough to make you cringe. There are also many parts where he inspires hope, works to reduce anxiety, and generally pushes a positive outlook on the world. 

The first part of the book is about why and how to not try in life. Manson explains that people just try too hard and get too worked up, and if everyone just relaxed a little bit and tried less the world would be a better place. I can't really disagree with him there; for most of my life I have adopted the same mindset, and surely haven't tried too hard. However, I think there is immense value in trying at the right things; the important things. Manson addresses this a little (even the title is disingenuous, what he means is "The Subtle Art of Giving a Fuck About the Right Things."*), but I still left the section feeling like he downplayed the importance of effort. Later on, in a similar vein Manson argues along the lines of "everything's fucked" and nothing really matters, and that everyone is kind of an asshole but so are you so we can't reasonably expect to make things to good here on earth (I'm paraphrasing and exaggerating surely). This kind of thinking is dangerous, and generally too pessimistic for me to agree with.

That's essentially my main gripe with the book - it's a bit too pessimistic. Other than that, there are many well-founded and good-intentioned insights in the book. And believe me, I kept trying to find reasons to dislike this book. He would say something and I'd think finally, I knew this guy was an ass but then he'd address it in a different perspective and make me nod my head in defeat. We live in a difficult world to navigate, and Manson brings up many ways to make it even just a bit easier.

 In one section, the importance of values is explored. What are your values? This is a tough question to answer, but as is argued in the book is a very important one. You might discover you have values that don't make sense, aren't achievable, or just aren't healthy. It is important to have values that you can directly impact, or else when something happens you can't control and this value is unachieved you are left feeling badly about yourself. I am still having trouble thinking of my values after reading this book, but it has been nice to think about and see how my values impact my decisions and life. 

Most of the ideas in The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck are not very bold or mind-blowing; I don't think you'll put down the book at some point and think "wow, this guy's a genius!", but the ideas are important and difficult to iterate, and Manson does a good job of laying them out ideologically but also with examples of how to apply these ideas to your life (5/15/2021).